Wednesday, July 13, 2011

This post is much, much dumber than the last one

Ally McBeal would be a pretty good show if it were not for one person:

JOHN CAGE.

His character is stupid. His stuttering is annoying. His idiosyncrasies are inane. He expects everyone in his firm to just cater to his bizarre needs without making any efforts to help.

Most disgustingly, I have never once (and I am more than halfway through the entire run of the show) heard him make an argument that did not wholly consist of trying to sway a jury through emotion rather than actual, legal, factual statements (basically, jury nullification). His objections are tedious and useless, he refuses to bend to courtroom etiquette*, and he antagonizes judges with impunity and he is never punished for it ever. He can tell a judge, to his face, "I'm disappointed in you" and not even get fined. It's disgusting.

*my knowledge of courtroom etiquette is entirely based upon my extensive viewing of law and order and law and order SVU. here is your grain of salt

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